Miss Nancy's Dating Rules for Men in 2024
10 Things You Should Start (and Stop) Doing
At the risk of sounding more like a Geezer than a Beezer, here goes!
Men sometimes turn to me for dating advice — online and IRL (in real life).
I hope this handy-dandy guide doesn’t come across as too prudish or judgmental, but I have noticed certain behavior patterns over the past few years that I’ve been single, so I’m compelled to share.
Invest in great profile pics. On a tight budget? Find a friend who’s good with a phone camera (or an old-fashioned camera) and engage them as your creative director/stylist. Shoot a range of pictures, but keep them natural (see #2-4).
Keep the pets at home, including dead fish, tigers, and that adorable pooch you’re kissing on the mouth. One shot with your puppy is fine, but most women want to date the man and not his canine.
Filters are funky. Eventually you may meet someone in real life and you don’t want them to be shocked by how you really look.
If you carry a few extra pounds, wear them proudly. See #3.
Tell the truth about age. I get the whole algorithm and search thing. (After all, I work in tech.) But either come clean in your profile or at a first meeting.
Keep it in your pants. Unless a woman asks specifically for a shot of your junk, keep it in your trunks. And don’t turn the convo to sex immediately, unless a woman has noted on her profile that she’s DTF or looking for a one-nighter. (And yes…that abbreviation has made it into the dictionary!)
Ask good questions. And listen to the answers. Ask more questions based on them, but don’t interrogate. Although we’re >50, we have plenty of time to find out more about people we like. Starting a conversation with “How are you today, gorgeous?” may just result in a “Thank you. Good.” That’s not a dialogue.
Check your spelling. At our age, we should know the difference between “you’re” and “your.” If you want to attract a bright high-quality woman, pay attention to details.
When you attend live events, take full advantage of them. My friends and I notice that sometimes guys will stand off in the corner (sometimes in pairs) like they’re at their first dance. Be bold and come prepared with some conversation-starters.
If you get rejected (which will happen), take it like an adult. Try not to be defensive or pushy. Some women may be willing to offer helpful feedback, but most just want to pull off the bandaid as quickly as possible. Unless you’ve been dating someone for months, they don’t need to explain themselves to you.
And, if you refuse to use dating apps (I get it!) engage in activities that will put you in places where lots of women hang out. Take a Pilates class. Sign up for MeetUp activities. Dress appropriately for the occasion, don’t be shy, and practice your pitch.
And, if you want one-on-one help to refine your profile or IRL social style, please get in touch. (In 2024 I’ll be offering personalized consulting for fans and followers!)
P.S. If any man would like to write an installment as a guest contributor, please reach out!