The Dating Process

A Second (or Third) Job That We All Seem to be Unqualified For

“Dating after 50 is so hard!”

Well, let me tell you something boys and girls…dating at any age has become difficult.

Technology is fantastic, but it’s opened up a virtually unlimited pool of potential suitors and range of challenges

And, many people are not quite sure what they really want or need, tasting all the dishes on the Italian/Chinese/Paleo/Snack/Miscellaneous buffet of men and women.

Before you embark on your own dating journey (or refine your strategy), first attempt to figure out what you’re looking for. Be:

• Specific

• Realistic

• Open-minded

• And, above all, kind and honest. You’re not trying on shoes. You’re dealing with real live humans with feelings and needs

Do NOT start the dating process if you really don't have time or interest in making it work. No one likes to feel like a seat filler when an hour suddenly opens up in your work or personal schedule.

And, if you're in the “buffet” stage or have significant obligations that cut into your free time, be honest with your dates.

Ask yourself:

• How much time and money do I have to invest in building a relationship?

• What obligations do I have that make scheduling time together challenging?

• Am I planning to date multiple people at the same time or do I like to focus on just one “prospect?”

Ready to start getting out there (wherever out may be)?

Where Do You Go?

We have more options than ever to meet people.

• Live events and activities (now making a post-pandemic comeback)

  • Volunteer projects

  • Bars and music venues

  • Sports activities

  • Organized travel excursions

  • A wide range of random experiences on MeetUp.com

• A massive array of dating apps

  • General

  • Hook-up

  • Geared to Specific Interests

  • Focused on “Seniors” (ugh…hate that term)

• Matchmakers (often pricey, but highly personalized)

But no matter which one(s) you choose, you must make time. But don’t let it overtake your life.

I’ve worked in marketing and business most of my career. The same principles that apply to a new product launch or marketing campaign apply to dating.

• Establish goals

• Map out a plan, but be flexible based on results and “market conditions”

• Learn from failures and celebrate successes

But unlike the fast-tracking of a social media campaign, “You can’t hurry love.” It’ll happen when it’s supposed to happen.

Take breaks when you start to burn out or feel demoralized. Spend more time on self-care than you do on looking for Mr. or Ms. Right.

The breaks will ultimately give you more confidence and make you more appealing to others in the long run.

But be patient, stay the course, and remain hopeful (unlike Larry).

Coming Up Next…Show Up & Don’t F*ck Up! How to Present Yourself Live or Online